Showering | Me, Myself, and Evan's

The Prednisone Problems

Posted on July 8, 2016

The Prednisone side effects are getting old – FAST. I just want to take a nice, relaxing, hot shower in peace! That isn’t an option. I didn’t even like showering that much until the steroids ruined shower time for me and now I want it back. I’m sick of short, cold showers. And feeling rushed. And did I mention cold? Using cold water is the only thing that seems to delay the overheating/hot flash/heart palpitations. Ugh.

Today I was getting dressed (putting on my pants, to be more specific) and, without any warning or buildup, my heart rate jumped to 165. It felt like my heart was trying to beat out of my chest and escape. Usually my heart palpitations gradually worsen and it slowly gets harder to breath. This was different, though. I got short of breath very suddenly and it scared me. I had to sit down. Oddly enough, my heart rate and breathing returned to normal almost as quickly as they spiked. It shouldn’t be that terrifying to put on pants. I would hardly call getting dressed a physical activity/exertion, but I guess I’ll add it to the list.

The other strange side effect I’ve been having now that I’ve been on high-dose steroids for six weeks is muscle weakness/tenderness. My husband tried to massage my shoulders earlier and the muscles in my upper back/shoulders were EXTREMELY tender and sensitive. Even though he was barely applying any pressure to the area, it was very painful. This concept is lost on me. There are areas on my lower legs where I have this problem as well. The area is sensitive and, when touched, feels the same way pushing on a painful bruise would feel. The part that concerns me is that there are no bruises there – not on my legs and not on my back. So why is it that these areas feel so bruised and painful? Is this the muscle weakness and destruction sometimes resulting from Prednisone usage? Will this problem reverse itself once I’m off the steroids or is this permanent? One more thing to worry about.

There is good news, though! Since the AIHA was the only one of the two diseases responding to the Prednisone and my hemoglobin went up despite the lower dose, I am fairly confident the doctor will taper my dose again on Monday! The taper will likely have little to no effect on my platelets, so it’s irrelevant in regards to the continued treatment of the ITP. Thank goodness! Get me off these things!

The Shower Situation

Posted on July 4, 2016

Last night’s shower at the cottage did not go well. My heart rate by the time I got out and got down to the basement to get dressed was past 160 again. The cottage shower is similar to ours at home in the sense that it’s a standing shower, rather than a tub, and it’s square. Unlike ours at home, the walls aren’t glass and instead of a door there is simply a curtain. I was hoping the curtain would make a difference and allow the steam to escape but it didn’t help much at all. Every time my heart starts racing it becomes SO hard to take a deep breath. I don’t know which scares me more – the fluttering or the difficulty breathing. I also wonder how much my asthma plays into this. My asthma has always been very mild, though, and only really flares up when I have a cold/bronchitis or when I exert myself/exercise. I don’t really consider a shower exercise, though… It never bothered me before the Prednisone. Here’s to hoping this problem reverses itself once I’m off the steroids! Tonight’s plan is to take a colder, shorter shower and to put a fan in the bathroom window to help with airflow.

The Surprise Visitors

Posted on July 1, 20163 Comments

My little sister and her roommate were supposed to fly to Denver, CO last night for vacation, but due to flash flooding, all flights from Chicago to Denver were grounded and the airline couldn’t get them on a flight until Saturday night. Since they already had the days off of work and their bags were packed, they decided to take a spontaneous trip to NYC to stay at our apartment while we’re at the cottage. I’m excited that my sister got to see my apartment, but I’m even more excited that we overlap for about a day and a half, meaning that I got to see my sister today! It doesn’t make up for the Chicago trip I had to miss last weekend, but it’s still ten times better than not seeing her at all! I knew I missed her, but I forgot how much until I got to hug her.

In terms of my side effects, today was certainly better than the past few days. I still didn’t leave bed much and my appetite this morning and early afternoon was practically non-existent, but by dinner I was able to eat a real meal and sit up in bed for a little bit. For some reason, even though it makes me extremely overheated, laying on my husband’s shoulder makes my headache better. It might just be psychological, but I’ll take it! Also, the makeshift blackout curtains that my husband hung make a huge difference. My eyes have been super sensitive to the light.

The one thing that hasn’t improved at all is showering. Last night’s shower was rough. I think I was finally able to pinpoint the exact cause of the shortness of breath, though. The problem is the steam. Since our new apartment’s master bathroom has a small, square, glassed-in standing shower, the steam accumulates fairly quickly. Don’t get me wrong, I love having a glass shower, but I wish it was a little bigger so the steam had somewhere to go. The only way to obtain any relief was to periodically open the shower door to let some steam out and some cold air in. Basically anytime I wasn’t under the water (ex. soaping up or shampooing my hair) I had to leave the glass door open. Again, not ideal, but at least it was a workaround. Hopefully this won’t be a problem forever.

The only other update is that my foot cramps are back. That is definitely due to the Prednisone, though, so hopefully it won’t be a problem within a few weeks. I’ll just have to deal with it until then.

I’m finally all packed for the cottage and we’re hoping to leave tomorrow afternoon. Fingers crossed! Last time we headed to the cottage was Memorial Day Weekend and that didn’t end well, so here’s to hoping we finally get the relaxing week away that we want/need. My husband has been such a trooper taking care of me and waiting on me for over a month at this point – he deserves the chance to relax! Hopefully my Percocet/Oxycodone will keep the headache at bay long enough for me to relax this week, as well! Or at least long enough for me to survive the four hour drive upstate!

The Side Effects

Posted on June 28, 20161 Comment

I hope every day isn’t going to be like today. I wish I could at least know how long these IVIG side effects are going to last. Or I wish I could know how much of what I’m feeling is due to Prednisone withdrawal. I’m inclined to believe it is a combination, like the doctor suggested, but I’m praying most of it is just from the IVIG, meaning it will subside and eventually fade away within the next week or so. If these headaches and lack of concentration are mostly due to Prednisone tapering, I’m screwed for at least the next month. UGH!

The plan today, tomorrow, & Thursday is to work from home, but today was a total fail. I logged on around 8AM, had breakfast, took my pills, worked for about an hour and then the intense migraine set in and looking at the computer screen was making me want to claw my eyes out. I had to walk away. I took a couple of Percocet and then immediately fell asleep for an hour or hour and a half. By the time I woke up, the painkillers had kicked in and I had about 30-45 useful minutes before my headache returned. Anddddddd repeat the same process. All day. I ended up having to cancel/reschedule my graduate school interview that was scheduled for 6PM via Skype because I couldn’t function for more than a few minutes at a time. I feel bad cancelling and I hope it doesn’t hurt my chances of admission, but there is no way I would have been able to accurately portray myself in a video interview like this.

By the time dinner rolled around, I didn’t have much of an appetite. I made myself eat anyways, especially since I didn’t eat lunch. Then I had to face my newest enemy – the shower. Once again, my oxygen level dropped and my heart rate shot up. I don’t know if it is the steam, the enclosed space, or the fact that I’m standing for more than a couple of minutes, but it is extremely frustrating.

I think the thing that is perhaps the most frustrating, though, is how crappy I feel in general. A couple of weeks ago when my platelet count was awful, I felt totally fine. Things were going crazy inside my body, but on the outside, I had almost no symptoms. At the time it was terrifying, but now I miss it. It’s ironic how “getting better” has made me feel so, so much worse. Now that my platelets have reached an acceptable level, I’m all of a sudden completely broken on the outside. How does that make any sense?! Maybe this IVIG treatment was more intense than I had originally thought.

The Semi-Productive Sunday

Posted on June 26, 2016

Today was the most productive day I’ve had in a while. I woke up around 7, made myself breakfast and sat down to watch Netflix. After I ate I took my pills, ordered my husband a present off Amazon, added to yesterday’s blog post, and emptied the dishwasher. I laid down for a couple hours and then around 11 folded all of the clean laundry in our apartment – about four baskets full – before making lunch for my husband. We caught up on a few of our shows that we had fallen behind on and then he fell back asleep. I took this opportunity to do some work I hadn’t been able to get to during the week. I don’t like being behind and I finally had a three hour block where my headache was under control and I felt focused. That has been one of my major problems this last month that I didn’t even realize was happening until today – I have been completely unable to focus or concentrate on something for very long and I have been confused a lot more easily than usual.

Anyways, my day was productive and I felt accomplished. The only downfall, besides the massive headaches, is that I couldn’t manage to make it through my shower tonight. It felt like someone was sitting on my lungs. I tried pointing the water off to the side so it hit the wall instead of pummeling me in the chest, I tried making the water colder, and I tried just standing for a minute with my arms at my side, but no matter what I did, I couldn’t get my heart to stop fluttering and I couldn’t catch my breath. I would normally be afraid I was relapsing already, but the doctor said the Prednisone can cause the jittery/fluttery feeling.

I had to get out of the shower and sit on the bathroom floor until my heart rate returned to normal. I then proceeded to cry for a solid ten minutes. Why are even the simplest of things so much harder lately? I don’t want a pity party and I don’t want to whine about how life isn’t fair, because it could always be worse and I’ve been blessed with so much in life, but I just wish I could know what’s normal. I wish I could know how much longer things are going to feel this way. I just want answers to questions that have none. For instance, how does one’s immune system just all of a sudden stop recognizing its own RBCs and platelets? Is there a cause? Is there something I could have done to prevent this? Is there a chance my immune system will ever reverse its decision to hate itself? I want to know more but ES is so rare that there is little to no research on cause, prognosis, or effective treatments. Every patient responds differently to the medications and it is essentially a guessing game – trial and error.

At this point, all I care is that I can get something for this headache because the Tylenol isn’t cutting it.